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It’s 11:00pm And Too Late For Me To Think Up A Title

It’s 11:00pm And Too Late For Me To Think Up A Title

November 29, 2005

I have always wondered what housewives did before the internet, when they were trapped in their suburban houses with little contact with the outside grown-up world. Now I know. They did housework, which sucked the souls from their very bodies.

I am completely caught up on laundry, organized my mudroom closet and took out all of the kids winter gear, cleaned all my bathrooms, mopped every floor in my house that doesn’t have carpeting, and fell in love with the Mr Clean Magic Eraser, which I used until it was just nubby crumbs in my hand. I am resisting the urge to call all my children “Beaver”

I wish I had real life friends, instead of my imaginary internet ones, because now would be a great time for them to stop by. I might even bake something tomorrow because I think I have run out of things to clean. Though my daughter is potty training, so there is always the chance she will pee on the floor and I’ll get to mop it yet again.

Should you stop by and find me wearing pumps and a pearl necklace, shoot me.

Posted by Chris @ 10:40 pm  

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Comments

  1. Flutter says:

    I hope that computer arrives for your sanity! I dont know what one did before the internet but I am sure it wasnt fun!

  2. Jeni says:

    I too know the joy of getting that eraser thingy down to a stub.
    Anyway back to the bangs, you have to read what I just posted and how my crap appearance hit a monumental low tonight.

  3. J├╝rgen Nation says:

    You’ll be a true 50s SAHM when you’re drinking vodka tonics and popping the valiums. Oh, the 50s. What couldn’t you do?

  4. Lisa says:

    Mr. Clean RAWKS! And after a few of those vodka tonics he starts to look pretty sexy, don’t ya’ think?

  5. Katie says:

    I’m so productive too when my internet is down. Didn’t SAHMs of the past have bridge clubs and dish of the month thingies to go to?

  6. Meg says:

    I think maybe you should come visit us for a few days. By the time you make it back home, you’ll have PLENTY to do again.

    By the way, you should take up a craft. I suck at crafting (knitting mostly, but other stuff, too) but I do it anyway because it’s fun.

  7. Darren says:

    Ooo! Ooo! Give me some directions! I’d go anywhere for baked goods!

  8. Suzanne says:

    Hey, I’m real!

  9. speckledpup says:

    I am NOT imaginary.
    I exist.
    really, I do.
    (looking in the mirror)
    yup I’m there, wrinkles and all.

    Hope you get your laptop soon.
    Buck up, June.

  10. lucylocket says:

    I knew that I was precariously close to that Cleaver state of mind when I experienced glee and delight watching the dirt particles dance in front of my new vaccuum. I nipped it in the bud quickly with a trashy romance novel and a tall, frosty glass of soda to while away the afternoon instead of cleaning everything in sight.

  11. Silly Old Bear says:

    Hey, on TVLand the kids are all potty trained! Did you ever notice that? Even the babies never walk out the front door, drop their pants and pee on the rosebush.

    Not that it ever happens here. No. If my kids are gonna drop their pants and pee, it won’t be outside! (Or, it’ll be on the neighbor’s rosebush)

    If you quit feeding Eddie Haskell the baked goods, he’ll quit coming around…

  12. halloweenlover says:

    Um, you could drink too, remember? I’m sure the baby won’t mind. It’ll be fun!

  13. O_Scientist says:

    WOOHOO! A clean house!!! So maybe it was good your computer broke?

    *ducking*

    Seriously, this sounds horrible, being forced to actually do housework! You could have spent this time to teach the kids so instead…

    Karen

  14. Sleeping Mommy says:

    I thought it was supposed to be here sooner. I’m sorry. I know how much it sucks.

    Personally I wouldn’t have the will to even do my housework if I couldn’t take breaks to sit down and catch up with my imaginary internet friends. ;)

  15. Happy Mom Tonja says:

    I just found your blog a couple days ago and I have to say your house looks and sounds so beautiful. Hoping you get your new computer asap!

  16. Jillbert says:

    Don’t do too good a job cleaning or your computer may be broken for much longer…….once my DH realized how much I get done without internet access, he slowed down on his response to my tech problems…….
    -Jill

  17. Jordana says:

    I think you’d look absolutely fabulous in pearls pushing a vacuum cleaner around.

    Actually, when my internet access goes down and I suddenly become the productive super housewife, I sometimes feel a little guilty about turning on the computer once I get my internet connection back. But only for about 15 seconds.

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