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Making Amends

Making Amends

December 29, 2005

This morning I woke up determined to right the wrongs that I did yesterday. The kids were still asleep and they all look so cute and innocent and QUIET when they are sleeping. Today was going to be Good Mother Day.

I took the leftover ham bone and made it into split pea and ham soup. I let the kids help me. Oh what fun was had by all! We chopped together, measured together, chopped some more. Oh so much damn fun I could hardly stand it! But wait, the day was just beginning I had much MUCH more fun planned.

Playing yahtzee

Then I played Animal Yahtzee. Not once, not twice, but four times. And considering how much I hate games, this was an impressive showing. And then, because I was playing Good Mom today, I played Animal Rummy. I didn’t let my eyes roll back in my head once and stifled the urge to say, “Hurry up, discard!”

Animal Rummy/

Then the kids smashed open the geodes they had received as stocking stuffers. That was FUN! What a great present that was for indoor use, because you know that you can never have enough tiny rock particles all over the house. And excited children running around waving hammers is always a recipe for success.

I ooohed and ahhhed over several Lego creations and proclaimed my love for them, saying I wanted to marry them I loved them so much.

Since I was also trying to work the good wife angle as well, I baked bread. The little kids helped knead it and only once did I have to remove a child from the table who decided that jumping on the dough would be a much more effective way to knead it.

Kneading dough

My daughter ate obscene amounts of candy all day long. But she did use the potty. I had to resist singing the song “Bigmouth” by The Smiths when she was eating two lollipops simultaneously, because it was good mom day. And good moms don’t sing songs like that. They sing songs like “Who is Captain Feathersword?” and they sing it without making any innuendos about what Captain Feathersword is tickling with that sword of his.

And we made homemade root beer with a kit my 9 year old got for Christmas. And then made some slime that my 8 year old got for Christmas. We learned that food coloring stains.

When my 8 year old told me that he had broken the faucet in one of our bathrooms by using it as a handle to hoist himself up onto the sink. I just smiled and walked away. This unusual reaction prompted him to follow me and ask, “Did you hear what I just said?” But I didn’t want to spoil Good Mother Day by shouting, “Are you freaking kidding me?”

Just when I thought the fun was coming to an end, someone suggested painting.

Before I could answer my brain exploded and began oozing out of my eyeballs. And my children grabbed their spoons and scooped it up and ate it. It was green. Now it is gone.

Here I am trying to hold my brain matter back in my eye sockets.

Moments Before I Died

This Good Mother Day was tough. I am looking forward to tomorrow when once again mediocrity can reign. Long live the good enough mother, I like her best — what with her intact brain cells and all. A solid C, that is what I am aiming for.

A Day in the Life set of photos is here.

Posted by Chris @ 4:18 pm  

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  1. novaks8 says:

    wow you look young.
    I hear that all the time and I tell people that the kids keep me young! HA

    All I could think was WOW look at the snow!
    But you guys are probably used to it huh?

    It has been in the 60’s all week here.

    Good job!

  2. Carmen says:

    You are a wayyy better mother than I am. I spent the day trying to get away from the children.

  3. deputyswife says:

    LOL, Super Mom! I think you more than made up for the previous day. Please return to normal mom mode at once. Before anymore green stuff oozes from your eyes.

  4. "D" says:

    gah,the pressure! I liked your other day better! Surely you used up enough good mom points to get you through til next Christmas? And yes, wow, you do look young!

  5. Annika says:

    Good lord, you look about twelve years old. Being good enough (as if anyone believes that) is obviously excellent for the skin.

  6. joy madison says:

    tee hee!!! I love it! I totally totally feel you on this! welcome back to the warm hug of mediocrity! We are waiting for you:)

  7. TB says:

    Sounds like it was a great day!

    Some of the best memories I have as a kid were when my mom and dad just hung out with us and played games. I’m willing to bet that your kids will remember the great day that they had your for many years to come!!
    As for the bad day, we all have them, a great day can make up for 10 crappy ones.

  8. ohhmama! says:

    You are amazing, I could never do it :) Looks like you little ones had a ball though, so I am sure it was worth it after all. You may look young, but you look beautiful from what we could see of your face. LOL. I am a young mom too.

  9. Jenni says:

    Cracking up at the Captain Feathersword comment…my husband views all the Wiggles with extreme suspicion.

    Been reading your blog for a few weeks now; thanks for blessing all of us in cyberspace with it!

  10. aka meritt says:

    That fact that you allowed to them cook and bake with you earns you the Mother of the Year for 2005 award.


  11. Jürgen Nation says:

    If that is you, I need to know how you had 7 children and still look this good. NOW, DAMMIT. I mean, DANG!

    And just an FYI, you did more yesterday than I did in all of 2005. I’m just sayin’.

  12. Meg says:

    I see that you, too, are a maker-upper of needlessly gory stories about your own body. Yesterday, I told Brent that my back hurt and it was because my spine had popped out of my back and someone thought it was spareribs and ate it and then threw it up and then slipped on the throw-up and fell down and then pooped on it because they were so upset. Can you tell I’ll be a GREAT mom when Sophia turns 7?

  13. halloweenlover says:

    I think I love Meg. She made me laugh so hard.

    Good lord, woman, I’m exhausted from READING about what you did all day. Where do you find the energy??????

  14. speckledpup says:

    I’m such a bad mother.

    I went home with a six pack of wine coolers last night and said if anyone talks to me they die.

  15. tender arts says:

    From what I can see of you, you look so young and pretty! Too bad about your brains though. I think Good Enough mother is best too. Otherwise you’re just scary!

  16. kalisah says:

    wow - look how pretty you look even with half your face covered.

    Is that LIPSTICK? Damn, you ARE a good mom.

  17. lipstickface says:

    i love you.

  18. B.E.C.K. says:

    Good heavens! Each of those projects would be a day’s worth of “good mothering” for me. You either totally rock or you are crazy (which would mean you totally rock, so it’s a win either way). ;^)

  19. Jen says:

    Oh, I feel so much better. I have friends who have lots of kids (5+) and they tend to give the impression that 5 or more is much easier than the two I have. Whatever they’re smokin’, I want some! LOL Definitely a good mommy day…I’m aiming for “eh” mommy week.

  20. Tay says:

    Aw, I love your daughter’s little topknot.

  21. nabbalicious says:

    Man, you’re a great mom. I wanna play games and knead bread by jumping on it, too!

  22. Sleeping Mommy says:

    I don’t know how you did all of that. I have lots of days like the one you described the day before but very very few like the one you describe in this entry. I HATE GAMES and avoid them like the plague. It’s sad. Sad for my kids.

  23. DollyMama says:

    A solid C. I like that.

  24. sarcastic journalist says:

    all those games? in one day? Man, you must be the best mom EVER. And then, to look cute in the process?

    You’re making me very jealous.

  25. CaliforniaGrammy says:

    Why only a “C?” I think you deserve a B+ at the very least! Love checking in on you — you make me smile every time I read your blog! Thanks!

  26. Kathy says:

    Oh Chris you better return to “mediocre mom” and soon. You’re making me look bad:-)Oh and as we know of course it’s all about me.lol

  27. FarmgirlCyn says:

    What a hoot you are! I have SO enjoyed dropping by your blog.Laughing out loud at your childrens antics. TOO FUNNY….But even funnier are your responses!

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