For The Love Of Popcorn
January 12, 2006
The other night Rob came home with a hot air popcorn popper. The kids were so excited. We gathered round the popper, the kids holding their popcorn containers in anticipation. We were having popcorn!
Rob turned it on. The unpopped kernels began flying out of the machine, taking the newly popped corn along with it. They were flying around the room, pelting us like tiny napalm bombs, landing on us and burning our skin. The kids were less than impressed and ran out of the room screaming about how much it hurt. Wimps.
Having never owned a hot air popcorn popper before this, we had no idea how efficient these things were. “Is it supposed to send all the popcorn flying around like this? It seems rather messy. Who would enjoy this?” Rob asked.
“Some popcorn loving masochistic freak, that’s who! For the love of God, TURN IT OFF!” I yelled, now safely in the other room with the
This thing didn’t work at all, less than 10% of the kernels actually popped, and those that did had to be gathered up from all corners of the kitchen. Luckily in our house we have the ten hour rule. Any food that is on the floor for ten hours or less is deemed worthy to eat. And equally as lucky, children don’t mind eating food that has once been on the floor.
“If I didn’t know any better I would think that there was a Candid Camera crew lurking behind our curtains.” I said, “Surely this has to be a joke.”
I suppose we should have been clued in by looking at the box. Any product that has nothing more impressive to boast about on it’s box than having an on/off switch, couldn’t be all that good.
Rob returned it to the store. I wanted to scrawl “PIECE OF CRAP” across the front of the box with a thick black marker to serve as a warning to anyone else who might want to buy a popcorn popper. But Rob thought that if I did that the store wouldn’t take it back.
This blog is nothing if not filled with good advice. Consider yourselves warned, people. Unless you are one of those popcorn loving masochistic freaks, and I mean that in a good way, in that case, this is the popcorn popper for you.
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