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Motherhood: Where The Insurgents Wear Diapers

Motherhood: Where The Insurgents Wear Diapers

February 22, 2006

I have to admit something that has been bothering me since the Frey story came to light.

My house is not yellow.

There I have said it. Shocking, I know. I am sure many of you feel duped, misled,because you related to me as the owner of a YELLOW house. In fact, my house is Linen White.

Somehow that did not have the same ring to it.

When I picked the blog name I really didn’t give it much thought. I had opened up the blogger page. Clicked where it said create your own blog and typed in the first thing that came to mine. In retrospect it is probably an unconscious theft from Bear in the Big Blue House.

For about 9 months now I have been thinking of moving away from blogger and setting up a new domain name. Althought the name choices seem endless, they are not. In fact every single domain name that I thought of and thought it was so clever and original is already taken. That would include thebigyellowhouse dot com, dot net, dot biz and variations thereof.

I enlisted friends, who were not all that helpful… you know who you are no need to single you out for public humiliation. And in another rash moment I bought a domain name.

www.lifeinayellowshoe.com

But, no sooner had I replaced my credit card into my wallet, I realized that I hated it.

When it popped into my head I thought it was sort of funny. A play off of the old lady who lived in the shoe.. You know, the one with too many children? The more I thought about it, the more I didn’t want to define myself that way.

I do love shoes. But yellow shoes… not so much.

I thought it might grow on me. Unfortunately, my post purchase remorse continued to grow.

All I could picture was a cartoon shoe with little cartoon children and a cartoon old lady. I hate cartoons. It’s the reason I have never been able to sit through an episode of the Simpsons, Family Guy, or whatever those other cartoons for grown ups are called. In the interest of full disclosure, I also don’t like unicorns, rainbows, fairies, or any of that mystical make believe Lord of the Rings type stuff. Moving along.

Today while I was driving home from the dentist, why yes I do live there, I thought of a domain name that I like. I also thought of taglines I liked. I was certain that it would already be taken. I rummaged through the car and my pocketbook for a pen and scrawled my idea on the back of my hand, just so I would not forget. Oddly, I have lots of fabulous ideas when I don’t have a pen and paper handy and within moments I promptly forget them all. I should start wearing a pen around my neck like old people do with their glasses.

I almost drove my car off the road in my quest for a pen, but it was worth it because no one else had picked the domain name. It was all mine. And faster than you can say American Express I bought it up.

And so, the big yellow house will be packing up. I am trying to decide what to pack and move, what to toss, and what price I can get for the god awful tsotchke we got as a wedding present and have been dragging around ever since.

There I go lying again. I have no wedding gift tsotchkes since we eloped and no one bought us a darn thing. We have no one to blame for the ugly crap in our house, but ourselves.

Motherhood Unmasked: notes from the trenches (notesfromthetrenches.com)

right now it just redirects you here.

Tell me how much you love it. If you don’t, well keep that to yourself.

I hate to disappoint, but I have no dentist stories for today. I did nothing to embarass myself. I’ll try harder next time, I promise.

Posted by Chris @ 3:56 pm  

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Comments

  1. Melissa says:

    I really like it. When do you think you’ll change over? I think that is the hardest think of starting a blog, to choose the name.

  2. Anonymous says:

    NO NO…say it isn’t so! I love the Big Yellow House…I don’t care if it is linen white. It just jumps out to me on my favorites listing. Wait… I know…this is your April Fool’s 5 weeks early. Yes, that’s it. Heart stops palpitating. I’ll be fine.

  3. Jeana says:

    I love it! I can’t believe it wasn’t taken. Of course I always loved the big yellow house, too…

  4. novaks8 says:

    Feeling like I did when they cancelled Homefront.

    Aghast.

    Linen white looks pretty darn yellow to me!

    Although I have inadvertantly visited another bigyellowhouse site and..um…it is NOT a family site.

    Whatever you decide, I will follow~!

  5. harvestmoon says:

    Isn’t there already a blog by that name? It sounds SO familiar! :) BYH is really nice (even if you LIED about your house color (I’m not sure I’ll EVER be able to trust another word you write!) - hey maybe you’re NOT actually IN the trenches - could the TRUTH be that you’re under the trenches? Or on TOP of the trenches? Or (horror of horrors), perhaps there are NO TRENCHES TO SPEAK OF????) Oh Chris, I’m not sure. I’m quite disallusioned right now. NOT a YELLOW house? Is it even a HOUSE??? Is it BIG??? Come now, give us something to believe in!!!!
    :)

  6. PD says:

    Picking a name is hard (I took forever, and am not sure I even like it as it makes me sound awfully materialistic) but I have found that writing the blogs is even harder for me. See I read all these great funny blogs like yourself and realize I don’t come close!

    That said, I love your blog and will follow you wherever you post. I love the new name.

  7. Denise says:

    I have always wondered why there were no photos of your big yellow house! Now I know. It’s ’cause you lied. But that’s ok. I don’t really mind at all.

    New name is fine but I will miss the Big Yellow House that never existed.

  8. Katie says:

    You know, so little about motherhood is what we choose it to be….your blog should be called whatever you want. I don’t care if you’re really a lonely 57 year old man living in a cramped apartment pretending to be a mom to seven kids and living in a big yellow house. I’ll still read your stuff no matter where I have to go to get it.

  9. Libragirl says:

    Just point me in the right direction and I will be there.

  10. Flutter says:

    Good for you that is awesome!

    You will have to keep us posted on the process and how hard it is to start your own site.

    I have been thinking about leaving blogger as well. The relationship is just about over!

  11. Sarah says:

    Chris-I’m shocked! I feel cheated!
    No, seriously, I like the the new name and would read you under any name(even if you don’t like yellow shoes).
    Linen white does look sort of yellow.

  12. Erin says:

    I like your new name. The Big Yellow House does work pretty well for you (despite the house not actually being white) because you do talk about fixing up your house as well as about your big family. However with the new name you really will know what the blog’s about by just reading the title and the tagline.

  13. Melissa says:

    Well, I just feel like I found you. And now your moving? It’s kinda like Sanford and Son, I hope I didn’t ruin the neighborhood!!! Good luck with the new domain and hope we all get an invite when your done decorating.

  14. surcie says:

    I really thought the house was yellow. A shade like butter, actually. I don’t know if I can keep lurking here anymore now that I know the truth. Linen!? How could you?

  15. aka meritt says:

    Wow, I had no idea you wanted to ‘move’. I have to admit I’m a little sad. I’ve always been envious of your “Big Yellow House” - love the template, love the look and love everything about it. Oh, I know I can get used to the new one too… but gosh. I luv your place here, name and all.

  16. SaucyMomma says:

    I have to agree with most of the comments. I really love the Big Yellow House. Even if it isn’t Yellow, it’s you.

    That said, I will continue to laugh out loud daily from wherever site you write. Thank you for taking off the mask we so frequently hide behind as mothers and sharing your stories from the trenches.

  17. Lammy says:

    Being a military wife….the trenches have many meanings for me.
    I’m with everyone who’s um….shocked… dismayed….LINEN?!…
    Alas, the pedestal has tipped a bit… but I will be your ever-faithful follower…flunky….or roady…whatever you need.
    (oh, great..my dh said the flunkies are the ones who provide sexual favors to the “star” while on the road………k. I like you a lot…but no sexual favors.. K?)
    *Just clickin on my fav’s…gonna set my ‘favorites’ link to your new domesticdomain! :) HUGS and Happy Thoughts for your upcoming Move!

  18. Liz says:

    where you lead I will follow follow all the way - oh wait, that’s a reeeeally old churchy song. anyways. set up housekeeping and invite us all for a housewarming party and maybe you’ll get crap you can blame someone for :)

  19. deputyswife says:

    I have been wanting to make a move too… Do you do your own templates too?

  20. Kim says:

    I love it! Granted, it will be difficult for me to get used to the new name but it’s good.

  21. Ms. Mamma says:

    I think it’s clever, cute and has some sass! I’m on a high as I just finished blogging about my first pee-pee/pot experience and when you pointed out the “facts” about The Big Yellow House, all I could think of was what a lot of pee-pee diapers you’ve changed and it all fell into place for me! Change is good and you are a role model for the challenge that is Motherhood. Congrats on your choice!

  22. Alissa says:

    love it! duly noted and bookmarked! Don’t worry, i’ll tell all my friends who don’t get the memo.

  23. CaliforniaGrammy says:

    What? No more Big Yellow House? Geeez! Oh well, you have a right to anything you want to . . . just make sure your fans will be able to find you when you do make the change! I love your blog . . . it is so one of my favorites!

  24. Jennifer says:

    yeah, i can see why you wouldn’t want to go with the yellow shoe. i like the new name a lot, am just a little sad about losing the big yellow house. you know, like when you come to the end of a book and that’s it, it’s over, and even if the writer does another novel, you know it just won’t be the same?

    but i know that won’t be the case with you. hope we’re all invited to the inauguration party.

  25. Deb says:

    DeLurking to say I love the new title, but also love this one b/c I just found you not too long ago. I only have 4 kids but every day you inspire me that I can do this b/c most days I feel like I can’t do it without seriously losing it somehow/some way! Anyway, as long as I can come along to read too…thanks for all you share and inspire!

  26. Kristie says:

    I don’t care if you confess your house is Pepto-Bismal pink, and your children are actually animated garden gnomes…. I love your site and will happily follow you. “If you write it, we will come” :)

  27. Lisa says:

    I too enjoy your site. I was debating moving from Blogger myself (still am) and confession? All I could think of was your name, only substitute “White” for yellow. And of course I didn’t WANT that, but I gave up because I couldn’t come up with a thing.

    I love The Big Yellow House, but I love the new one too. And I feel like I’m in the trenches 90% of the time.

    I’ll read you wherever you go!

  28. Riley* says:

    Wherever you go.. the mcveay family will follow!! i love your new idea :) but sure well miss the Big yellow house that never was.

  29. Jurgen Nation says:

    I’ll go to where ever you’re at.

  30. Anonymous says:

    Your new name is fab! Love your blog, and will follow you anywhere. (No, I ‘m not weird, just a suburban mom who loves your writing!) Maddy

  31. Heather says:

    The only thing that has made me flinch a little, is I absolutely LOVE your header, The Big Yellow House, with the picture of the house and the kids. It just makes one envision your gorgeous “white linen” (which looks yellowish to me) home with all these kiddos growing up inside of it. It is very Norman Rockwell(ish).. :)

    Wherever you go, I am sure you now are aware YOU WILL BE FOLLOWED, like some poor victim of the papparazi or something, but in a good way! :) Love your blog and would be SO SAD if it just never existed, ever,ever again. :(

  32. Stephanie says:

    I like the new name but even if I didn’t… I’d follow you anywhere. ;o)

  33. Meg says:

    You mean my suggestions sucked? I’m shocked…really. :) I like the new one…it’s good…

  34. Mich says:

    Delurking to say two things:
    LOVE the new name and
    What is a tsotchke?
    I HAD a wedding brou-ha-ha and I don’t think I got one…
    (y’know, now that I think of it, I do remember a pic of the porch once…did I not notice it was attached to a non-yellow house???)

  35. halloweenlover says:

    I thought you told us before that it was yellow-ISH. I’ll take yellowish.

    I like the name! But I’d goo even if you named yourself http://www.diaperfactory.com.

    Now I’m jealous. I go back and forth on moving from Blogger and always chicken out. Hmmm.

  36. Jody says:

    SOunds good to me.

    Shall we switch our blogrolls to the new name yet, or wait?

  37. april says:

    I’m just sad. I just put The Big Yellow House into my daily routine. I was all comfortable and now someone stole my pillow.

  38. Kim says:

    Well, I live in a yellow house. Will that work for you by association? No? Hmm…okay.
    I want to follow you to the new blog park though, okay?

  39. Anonymous says:

    Whoa. Big Yellow House was so cheery and Life in the Trenches sounds so bleak. Wish I could say this wouldn’t affect my reading habits, though it probably will–but of course it’s your blog and you can do whatever you want. I’m very sorry to see the Big Yellow House go.

  40. The Daring One says:

    I like it. There’s already a lifeinashoe.blogspot.com lady anyway. Very fun. I remember when I came up with Daring Young Mom and I just “knew.” Then I google searched “daring young mom” in quotes and there wasn’t a single hit. Then I really knew. I’m excited. It’s fun to have a change every once in a while.

  41. Chris says:

    Ya know what anonymous, big yellow house DOES sound cheery.

    And I am NOT cheery. I am dark and sarcastic and pessimistic.

    And everyday I feel like I am slugging it out in the trenches, an army of little people plotting my demise. I am not skipping along a flower covered path at the sunshine house.

    If changing the name of my blog is going to cause you not to read anymore, then you obviously don’t “get” me anyway.

  42. Anonymous says:

    Whoa. I didn’t mean to get banished, and I truly did mean it when I said it’s your blog and you can do whatever you want. I just meant that the old name made me feel good, made me want to come here first thing when I sign on, before visiting any other blogs, and that the new name probably wouldn’t have exactly the same effect. I love sarcasm and pessimism and I always felt I did “get” you. I didn’t mean that I wouldn’t read anymore, I just meant that the old name was very welcoming and made me want to come here first–and that I would miss it. I was just trying to make chit-chat and feel sort of stunned. Please nevermind. I didn’t mean to anger you.

  43. Chris says:

    Anonymous,

    I am not angry. I am, however, much more receptive to comments that are not given behind the veil of anonymity.

  44. Anonymous says:

    I’m not trying to be anonymous, my name is Sherrie, I just don’t have a Blogger ID. I’m sorry I upset you, I was just trying to offer my opinion like the others. I didn’t for a second dream that it would strike you the way it did. I guess that’s all I have to say.

  45. elian says:

    Love it… keep up the great work!

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  47. Maddy says:

    Not yellow, well that’s ok ‘cos my blog says “maddy’s glass house” and that ain’t true either, lol.

    Good luck with your very own domain, I hope you will have a new-house-party, we can all send gifts to make up for the missed wedding gifts.

    Please keep your unique look, I just love the yellow with black and white photos.

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