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the reason i will be bald next week in California

the reason i will be bald next week in California

July 20, 2006

Chris:I have good news and I have bad news
Chris: the good news is that blogger sucks
Chris: and I have said f you to them
Chris: yet again
Chris: because i can never learn my lesson the first time, oh no
Chris: and the better news is that I figured out how to add a new domain name on to my host thingy
Chris: the bad news is, as evidenced by my use of the word thingy, that I have no idea what I am doing


: more bad news
Chris: eating 5lbs of skittles doesn’t help at all
LSF: who knew?!
Chris: now we do, be advised


Chris: In more good news I have eliminated yet another job
Chris: from the list of potential careers I could have
LSF: oh yeah
Chris: web designer
Chris: because aside from my complete lack of knowledge
Chris: i hate needy people
Chris: oh my website, it’s not working
Chris: help help help
LSF: people like you
Chris: exactly


: just emailed my website host
Chris: there is a thing to check about the priority level of your email
Chris: it’s so subjective
LSF: and you checked?
Chris: URGENT, of course
Chris: does anyone check low priority?
Chris: oh after you sweep the office and feed the fish, why don’t you answer me
Chris: if there was one that said
Chris: I’d have checked that


LSF: did you hear back yet?
Chris: yes
Chris: and I have no idea what any of it meant at all
Chris: gibberish I tell you
LSF: uh-oh
Chris:I emailed back and asked if there was anything he could do on his end
Chris: as in do it all himself
Chris: move the blog over himself
Chris: leave me out of it
LSF: good luck with that
Chris: I tossed my blonde hair
Chris: and showed my cleavage while I typed it
LSF: and how would he see that?
Chris: oh details details


: got an email back
Chris: he said yes
Chris: he could do it
Chris: who is laughing NOW?
Chris: he was totally dazzled by my imaginary cleavage and hair tossing

LSF* is Long Suferring Friend who listens to be bitch and moan on IM and probably wishes she had never even told me her IM nickname, because all she really wants is to relax… and eat her tacos in peace

The Frey Clause: I didn’t copy these IM’s verbatim, so assume their veracity at your own risk. Participants in conversation my not be a funny as they appear here.

Posted by Chris @ 8:09 am  

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  1. MommyHAM says:

    Love your clause there at the end…makes me think of the Seinfeld episode where George thinks of all the good comebacks well after the appropriate time….

  2. ben says:


  3. Cmommy says:

    You are so funny, I lol here a lot–thanks, I needed it today!

  4. The Lazy Organizer says:

    I always like to check Low Priority on those things. I think it makes me look patient and long suffering. People in real life would never think of me that way so why not fool total strangers.

  5. Erin (erin-erin-bo-berin) says:

    If James Frey had only used the ‘Frey Clause’ he wouldn’t have to be humiliated on TV by Miss Oprah!
    I’m laughing so hard! Thank you so much - I needed this today.

  6. zookeeper says:

    Glad to hear I’m not the only one who’s conversations, either IM or IRL, always play out funnier (after the fact) in my head! :)

  7. Y says:


  8. Carmen says:

    I’m in awe of your cleavage myself. missy.

    And I’m stunned that LSF was still able to eat her tacos. I’m off them FOR LIFE!

  9. Jenny says:

    You are hilarious, Chris! I can’t wait to see your bald skull at BlogHer.