don’t leave this open on your coffee table
August 6, 2006
Because unless breasts are popping out of a bikini top, they are offensive.
Jen wrote about the babytalk magazine on her blog also and shared photos of herself nursing her babies. So I though I’d share one of mine too.
This photo is several months old and is the last time that Miles nursed. The last time I nursed a baby. The last time I will ever nurse a baby. A whole large part of my existence that came to an end is captured here.
He had been slowly weaning himself, first cutting down to nursing only a handful of times a day, then to once a day, and finally to skipping entire days. He was ready to wean. I was ready for him to wean, most days. The other days I was a weepy mess over my bay-bee and sufferring with rock hard boobs.
He had gone for more than a week, and I thought we were done nursing, when one day he climbed onto my lap and asked for “num-num” His little hand reached up and stroked my cheek. He brought his long legs up onto my lap and hooked them around my other arm. I felt the weight of his huge melon head in the crook of my arm. He looked me in the eye and periodically would pause to smile.
It was like he needed one last nursing for closure before he moved on with his big boy, bad ass self.
I happened to have my camera sitting next to me and snapped this picture. How often do you photograph the last of something, a turning point?
It amazed me then, and amazes me still, that my body could grow a kid. Nine months of gestating and then however many months of solely nursing. It makes me wish I could be kinder to myself and let the body hatred go, but well, that will probably never happen. I do hope, however, that my daughter will see photographs like these and appreciate her body, not buy into the images that we are all force fed by the media. And so that is why I share my photograph.
For my daughter. For all the other daughters. So I never again have to hear another woman say nursing breasts are disgusting, shameful, and something to be hidden.
Update: Go here to find links from other mothers who have posted photos of their nursing babies and written about this very same thing.
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