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Who is really my favorite?

Who is really my favorite?

August 8, 2006

Mom's Favorite?

Do you remember my BREEDER!!!1!! post a couple of months back?

Well, a couple of weeks before Blogher I got an email from Kristin who had read my BREEDER!!!1!! post and decided to make t-shirts like them to kick off her new t-shirt printing business. She wanted to know the sizes of my children so that she could being me some of the shirts as she was going to Blogher also.

Oh exciting! I sent the sizes off to her. Then I promptly forgot all about it because I had important thing to do, like pack my shoes.

So fast forward to the Hyatt. She leaves the shirts in a gift bag at the front desk and asks them to give them to me. Which they assure her they will. But this is the same front desk that tried to charge me $30 for a drink bill that wasn’t mine, charged my debit card almost $600 for my hotel room instead of $300, and could not give directions to anything near by with any sort of accuracy.

Knowing this, what do you think the chances are that I got the shirts?

If you answered none, you would be right.

So the entire Blogher conference, she thought I had recieved the shirts. I am sure she was wondering why I never even bothered to acknowledge them. And was probably regretting even making them for me because what kind of person doesn’t acknowledge a gift?

The kind of person who never recieves it, that’s who.

I arrived home from Blogher to an email telling me that somehow the hotel had given the shirts to the wrong person. This person contacted her and offered to send the shirts on to me.

And when I found this out I felt horrible. I would have loved to say thank you in person for such a kind and thoughtful gift.

Yesterday I went to my mailbox and there were the shirts. The kids were all excited and promptly put them on. I took the opportunity to take a picture of them.

Awwwwww, so cute. The shirts that is.

Shortly after taking the ONE decent picture a fight broke out over who was in fact my favorite. A fight which spiraled down into a slap fest and loud screaming, “No I am mom’s favorite!”

A fight which found me standing in front of my house shrieking, “You know who is my favorite? None of you. None of you are my favorite!”

And so I decided that aside from securing my place as the winner of the Bad Mother of the Year award for all time, I don’t need this shirt:

BREEDER!!!1! t-shirt

I need this one:

None of them are t-shirt

Maybe I should just wear the tiny tshirt that advertises condoms which came in our bag of shwag at Blogher, as a warning for others. The t-shirt that says, if you used our condoms you would fit into this t-shirt still and not have to deal with tantruming children who would find something to fight about even if they were somehow contained in a completely empty and sensory deprived environment.

Or maybe it says that only people who are this size should have sex. I don’t know. I’m not really sure what the message of the child sized t-shirt was supposed to be, just that I think it would be funny to wear it out in public with my children.

Posted by Chris @ 6:35 am  

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  1. T in HD says:


  2. Lilly says:

    Well at least you got that adorable photo before the fight broke out! I’d love to have seen the next photo of them in a slapping frenzy of ‘I’m mom’s favorite!’

  3. Lucie says:

    Chris your kids are cutie pies.

  4. Meg says:

    That’s hilarious!!!

  5. ali says:

    oh my goodness. they are TOO cute.

  6. Kristen says:

    My heart was in the right place. Little did I know that mass hysteria would break out. But how cute are they? The better picture really would have been 2 minutes later though…. Glad you liked them.

  7. Kim in MI says:

    LOL I love the shirts! They look great! And all the kids look like they’re thinking, “Mine’s the one that means it”

    I think wearing the condom shirt while being out with 7 children would be a hoot!! I can see the condom company running after you calling “Ma’am? Ma’am? Could we pay you to wear a different shirt? Because, no offense, but you’re really not the image we’re trying to portray …”

  8. Christina says:

    That is toooo funny! I just started reading your blog about a month ago so had missed the BREEDER post, thanks for pointing that out. I think I may need some of those shirts for my three “angels”

  9. InterstellarLass says:

    That’s too cute. Note to self: don’t stay at that Hyatt! I really hate hotels that don’t know where they or anything else are. I spent 30 minutes driving up and down a 5-mile stretch of highway looking for a hotel. When I called to ask which exit they were at (heaven forbid they know their own exit!) I was asked if I saw another hotel…because they were right behind that one!

  10. peepnroosmom says:

    Your kids look very cute in their new shirts. I would love to see the “after” shot, though.

  11. Erin says:

    Even better to wear it if you’re obviously pregnant! Of course, then it would probably be more like a 1/2 shirt, but it adds to the hillbilly breeder-out-of-control effect…that’s me, knocked-up 3 times in 4 years.

  12. I Dressed Myself says:

    Hmmm…I haven’t even though about who is my favorite yet. Those shirts are funny and I think it would be hilarious if you wore the condom shirt in public. =)

  13. Chris says:

    Yes. I will take two of those shirts. I think my husband and I should each have one.

    Great photo of the kids! I also liked your post on Disney World and looking forward to more. My husband and I have been trying to come up with economical places to take the children. We struck DW off the list. After reading your post, I think it could be doable…

  14. rachel says:

    great shot, and what a great story. looking forward to reading the disney post.

  15. Kathleen Marie says:

    Adorable bundle of love and hugs you have there. Very funny blog ;)

  16. Jennifer says:

    You always make me smile, but today you made me laugh out loud. I would have loved to have seen that fracas!! Better you than me. Of course, probably it will be my turn for the disaster…at MY house :)

  17. JustLinda says:

    So funny, I just blogged about how I handle the “favorite” question with my five girls (”Well, honey, you KNOW your sister has always been my FAVORITE, right?” hahahah)

    Cute shirts!!

  18. Daisy says:

    How about a shirt for you that says “All of them are my favorites!” or a generic yet confusing “I like this one best!”

  19. Angela says:

    I found your blog after your Breeder post, so I hadn’t read it. I couldn’t for the life of me figure out the 1 in the midst of the exclamations. I’m so glad you pointed out that it was errant because I would have been awake all night wondering what deep meaning lies behind the 1, sent by an oh-so intelligent person who clearly was her mother’s favorite.
    I think you are hilarious and applaud your ability to shirk it off and make it even funnier. I am continually shocked that people think to reprimand for such things.
    I was my mom’s favorite though, so maybe my perception is skewed.

  20. Fold My Laundry Please says:

    Your mentioning wearing the condom t-shirt while out with your kids reminded me of this commercial (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z07vk78H46w). I’m not sure what country it’s from, but it is hilarious!

    If it were me, I would have kept clicking away with that camera…at least until blood was spilled!

  21. kathryn, dym says:

    I was totally thinking, “Chris is the only person who will fit in this t-shirt. Maybe I should send her mine too.”

    This post was so hilarious. I really hope you have that shirt made.

  22. becky (misspriss) says:

    thanks for the reminder - i think i’ll go check my credit card bill now.

  23. madre-terra says:

    Once I was parking at our local market and a woman who I admire as parent was slamming her car door while vehemently saying, “Fine. You can all stay in there and kill yourselves!”
    She has 3 girls.
    Nice to know that all your moments aren’t out of the “Waltons”.
    Made me laugh.

  24. Nicki says:

    Who could possibly choose a favorite? They are all so cute in the picture. Your posts are always good at stirring the emotions. Thanks for the laugh!!!

  25. Katie says:

    I’ll take 5 please.

  26. blog says:


    i agree…