home again, home again, jiggety jig
August 24, 2006
I am sitting in the chair, reclining. My arms are folded over my body, hands clenched tight. My eyes are shut tight. I am wearing a paper bib and large sunglasses.
The hygenist picks up the tools. She begins to tell me about them. I wave my hand.
“I don’t need the details. It just prolongs the inevitable agony.”
“Are you in pain?”
“No. Just anticipating it.”
And so it began.
Turns out I needn’t have worried so much. There is no metal poking scraping thing anymore. It was like a high powered water pick that she used to clean my teeth.
Then after the cleaning she went around with that little tool to measure you gum recession or something like that. I am not sure exactly because I was busy practicing my deep Lamaze breathing, through my nose, to fully pay attention.
I did really well on the gum test. If they were handing out gold stars, I would have gotten one. The hygenist said that I had the healthiest mouth she had seen in years. Then the dentist walked in and she reiterated her statement.
“My teeth may be disintegrating out of my head as we speak. But damn my gums are good.” I said.
I started laughing. And the denstist started laughing. We had tears streaming down are cheeks we were laughing so hard. The hygenist did a little nervous laugh, but really she had no clue what was going on.
Finally we clued her in on all the work I have had done over the past 18 months and how it has cost me the equivalant of the gross national product of a third world country, not even neccessarily a small third world country. I’m not sure why it was so funny, just that it was. Perhaps there was a nitrous leak.
But it was good news. Good news that I needed to hear.
I immediately came home and told Rob that all the flossing he considers “excessive” has paid off.
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