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Suddenly my day is looking much brighter

Suddenly my day is looking much brighter

October 18, 2006

Today I decided to clean my keyboard. It had all sorts of crumbs and dust in between the keys. At first I was cautiously going around the keys trying to stuff the q-tip and paper towel in between the keys. But then I decided to pop off the keys a few at a time so that I could really clean. You know where I am going with this already, don’t you?

I am not a typist. I use a total of four fingers to type utilizing the ever efficient hunt and peck method. Therefore, I did not know where the letters belonged.


Right now when I hit the F key the R shows up. But oddly enough if I don’t look closely at the keyboard my fingers seem to know where to go.

I was thinking, “Damn, this stinks. I have to pop the letters back off and fix it. What a hassle. Whoa is me and my insurmountable problems. I should go drink a glass of wine or three except that it is only 3:00 in the afternoon.”

But then… I read this piece of news.

If there ever was a cause for the Bad Day song from American Idol to start spontaneously playing in the background it would have been then.

Me and my dyslexic computer are having a really REALLY good day.

Posted by Chris @ 3:24 pm  

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  1. Katie Ricks says:

    OMG! I was just telling my coworker about this! It sucks being a klutz!!

  2. Jonathon says:

    This is why I never clean my keyboard.


    ‘Tis that simple.

  3. Contrary says:

    That poor guy. He’s out 139 million and the entire world knows what a doofus he is. And I mean that in the best way, because it sounds like something I would do. We doofuses have to stick together.

    Also, when I clean my keyboard, I lay the keys out in the order that they appear on the keyboard itself. Now that sounds like I’m real organized. I wish that was true. I’ve simply done what you did enough times to figure out that there had to be a better way.

  4. Elizabeth says:

    I just finished reading that too. Did you follow the link to Nora Ephron’s account of the incident? It’s a fun read.

    I’ve never taken the keys off the keyboard to clean under them. God only knows what it looks like under there.

  5. Wendy says:

    I never thought of taking my keys off the keyboard to clean it. They actually come off and you can put them back? I just live with the crumbs. Now, you got me thinking.

    I am sure my husband wouldnt be pleased. Everytime I decide to clean up the computer I end up deleting a program that we actually need, like Macfee. Oh well, it only took him all night to fix it.

    I dont feel too sorry for the guy and his painting. I am sure that kind of money is nothing to him. I am sure he has another famous painting that someone will buy for a trillion dollars.

  6. Jessie says:

    Next time, get your vacuum hose, and attatch the bristle brush to it. You know, the one for the drapes or the furnature. I just used it on my laptop, and it got so much crap out. Enough to make a small animal.

  7. CathyC says:

    I don’t know which is funnier, you having a dyslexic keyboard, or the poor guy who elbowed the picasso. I’m at work right now and I’m trying not to LMAO.

  8. Daisy says:

    Someone is always having a worse day than I am. As for the keyboard thing; office supply stores sell a “data vac”. No, it doesn’t vacuum and dispose of your data, it’s a tiny vacuum that cleans your keyboard.

  9. CaliforniaGrammy says:

    I’ve used “canned air” and it seems to work great. It’s pressurized and blows away all the dust, etc.

  10. moi says:

    Once, way back in the 80’s, I dared some co-workers to rearrange the letters on the TYPEWRITER of someone we couldn’t stand. I don’t remember if they rearranged or just popped em off, but 20 years later it still makes me laugh.

  11. madre-terra says:

    So, I guess he really gave Picasso the finger. How rude.

  12. Playdate Susan says:

    What is this CLEANING of which you speak?

  13. Kristie says:

    That reminds me of a story I heard a few years ago of a guy who bought a gazillion dollar bottle of vintage wine at an auction, then dropped it just minutes later and it broke. The wine spilled all over. Can you imagine seeing your obnoxiously-expensive red wine soak down into the carpet, knowing there is NOTHING you can do at that moment ??? I’ve seen grape juice soak the carpets here at home, but luckily I only paid two or three dollars. :)

  14. InterstellarLass says:

    Well, if you have a standard keyboard, the keys on the top row, starting from the left should spell QWERTY, and they are called QWERTY keyboards. I use the canned air too to clean between the keys. It’s also good for cleaning nooks and crannies around the house.

  15. Gillian says:

    Isn’t this the gentleman who usually fires somebody when he… Guess there was no one around to toss out on their ear.

  16. Angie says:

    Call me a keyboard geek, but I checked a typing book out of the library when I was in the fourth grade, and I never returned it. I avoided the library for years in fear of their retribution. What I learned is that the middle row is (left side first, followed by the right side from right to left): asdfg ;lkjh
    Then the top row is: qwertpoiuy
    and the bottom row is zxcvb/.,mmn (we usually say ? instead of /, but you get the idea.

    It loses something in the translation. I’m actually saying the key names in my head, like constantly. I need help. . .

  17. meredith says:

    You’fe so runny!

  18. bluepaintred says:

    my keyboard reads different then Angie…

    but the whole concept of a dyslexic computer is heartening. I urge you to keep it how it is!

  19. Kari says:

    Meredith -

    *Giggle* That was so cute!

  20. Katie says:

    I bet I could fix the painting up with a little scotch tape.

    My keyboard is gross and it’s just going to have to stay that way. Cause I’m one of those weirdos who did really well in high school typerwriting class so I touch type.

  21. Joanne says:

    I started taking my keys off to clean once. I realized I did NOT know all the keys, so began removing just 4 at a time, strategically placed in formation so as not to replace them wrongly. Worked much better than removing all of them.

  22. Elizabeth says:

    I like the canned air for my laptop. While you are at it, blow out the fan on the back/bottom, too. I have an office job and our tech guys say this really helps to decrease overheating. For my desktop computer, I pick up the whole keyboard and shake it upside down. I have to tell you that when I first did this at my office (remember, I inherited this computer from my predecessor) - *fingernail* clippings came out. Yes, plural, as in more than one. Apparently he not only clipped at the desk, he didn’t retrieve them.

  23. wanderingrose says:

    Years ago I cleaned a keyboard at work that way, I did fine with all the letters abd then put numbers on numeric keypad back in the same order as the telephone. Duh!

    A techie girl like me should know better.

    I worked on a computer in the shop once where no matter what I did the keystrokes came out wrong, drove me crazy, turned out the user had set it up for the dvorak keyboard she uses.

    Duh, again! :)

  24. ek says:

    I took the keys off my keyboard once and it took FOREVER to get it back together. I have since taken a picture of it - as all those *{~? always totally mess me up - even if I do have *qwerty* down. My Qq button is sttttticking lately.

    Keep the canned air AWAY from kids - it can be fatal - believe it or not…

  25. Nicole says:


    a picture of my keyboard minus a few keys…I still need to get motivated to do the rest…