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in the interest of full disclosure

in the interest of full disclosure

January 24, 2007

Yesterday my 2 and 3 yr olds were feeling a bit under the weather. And it reminded of me of things that are much MUCH better about 12 yr olds.

1) They don’t cling to your leg, pulling on your pants until they almost come clean off your body, whining, “uP! uP!”

2) They can articulate exactly what hurts or feels sick on their body.

3) They can take their own tylenol, in pill form.

4) They usually don’t shake their head around and try to spit it out as soon as it touches their tongue.

5) They will willingly sprawl out on the couch and watch television.

6) They will not contaminate everyone else with their germs as they like all family members to respect their minimum 10ft circumference of personal space.

7) They will throw up in the toilet, or at least in the same room as the toilet.

8) They don’t wear diapers.

9) THEY DON’T WEAR DIAPERS.

10) They don’t wipe their noses on your shoulder.

11) They don’t climb all over you the second that you sit down, elbows and knees poking into your squishy parts, and head butting your chin so that you bite your tongue.

12) If they ask for a snack, they will eat every last crumb of it, possibly licking the plate. They will not crush it it their hand and then grind it into the floor. And then demand a new and different snack which you don’t have.

Posted by Chris @ 9:31 am  

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Comments

  1. cheryl says:

    lmao!

    mine are 6 & 7 so I’m somewhere in between…..but #11 had me chuckling because THAT still happens. Frequently.

  2. cheryl says:

    oops, I’m sorry - cheers to you for the laugh this morning.

  3. Jen says:

    This post made me laugh! Both of my kids were just sick with a stomach virus and I was thinking how great it would be if they were not in diapers and could throw up in the toilet, or near the toilet, or near any sort of bucket… Rather than on my shoulder!

  4. Jaye says:

    Oh so true! My 2.5 year old just had his tonsils out on Friday. So 1-5 and 8-12 really apply to me right now, especially #4!

  5. Jennifer says:

    #’s 11 and 12 describe the better part of an average day at my house. Maybe someday my parts won’t be so squishy and we can eliminate 11.

  6. The Wooden Porch says:

    Give me a teenager any day, then!

    (from a mother drowning in toddlers…)

  7. Novaks8 says:

    yep

    I still have an imprint on my chest from this weekend when my 3 year old was sick!

    When my 6 year old was sick? She slept for 4 days!

  8. CL says:

    I sometimes like it when the toddler climbs all over me. But not when I’m eating, drinking, reading, peeing, sleeping, you get my drift…

    Have a piece of the cake I want to eat RIGHT NOW, it might make you feel better…

    http://nutty-notes.blogspot.com/2007/01/blah.html

  9. Cheryl says:

    yes, yes, all very true - even though my teens might drive me nuts at times life has gotten easier with them growing up and I definitely get alot more sleep!!

  10. Jennifer says:

    Ahhh, so true. Great post to remind me to just appreciate the good qualities in my kids TODAY. Of course, this morning that wasn’t foremost in my mind as I watched my 8 yr old vomit on himself, and the kitchen table, and the breakfast nook in general. Good thing he wasn’t 2 or 3 or I would’ve had to clean up the mess myself. ;)

  11. bgirl says:

    Do you remember the scene in the Ya Ya Sisterhood movie (can’t recall if it’s in the book), where all the kids are vomiting and pooping everywhere and then the mom just runs away to a hotel? Yeah. I think of it every time that happens to me - only I can’t afford the hotel. Ha!

  12. shaz says:

    loooool!

    ” If they ask for a snack, they will eat every last crumb of it, possibly licking the plate. They will not crush it it their hand and then grind it into the floor. And then demand a new and different snack which you don’t have.”

    you were right on target with this one!!

  13. Rosie says:

    I am right there with you.

  14. Woman with Kids says:

    Huh. I’d still take the toddlers. When the boys are sick, they still want to cuddle, and spread some of their glowing, over-powering heat. And germs.

    Although the not wearing diapers, that does count highly in their favor…

  15. Susanne says:

    Thank you for this post. Thank you. My 4yr old has been feeling under the weather lately and then I stumbled upon the “just wait when they get older it gets worse”-post and briefly considered selling him.

    Though he doesn’t wear diapers. But the rest, all the same.

  16. Laurie says:

    Yes, we’re all sick here - the three kids (6 and under) and my preggo self and hubby too. Yes, they DO love to climb all over you. The biggest thing you left out though - I can’t get mine to lay down and ACT SICK. They still want to run around (and cause more TB-sounding coughing fits) and do whatever the others are doing. And I want them to lay on the couch with their favorite blanket and a popsicle. What was it my mother used to mutter under her breath?? Ahhh yes…’this too shall pass’. ;)

  17. InterstellarLass says:

    Ah yes. I was never so happy as when my children started to become self-sufficient.

  18. Katie says:

    I don’t think we can win for losing.

  19. Trish says:

    My 2 yo has been sick this week and spit a whole mouthful of sticky, grape-flavored children’s advil all over me. “I don’t like it.” I think I can identify with every point you made. Now I’m looking forward to the teenage years.

  20. Susan says:

    UGH! It really makes you appreciate it when everyone is well, doesn’t it?

    A few weeks ago, my 7yo was sick, and as usual I was the one sleeping on an air mattress on her bedroom floor and waking up (what felt like) every few minutes to help her puke and also wipe her behind! I told my husband I wanted to be the Dad in my next life. How the hell do they always get out of all the truly dirty work?

    Hope your babies feel better soon.

  21. Tricia says:

    Don’t you just love the elbow in the breast? Arghhh!

  22. Jackie says:

    I can so relate to your last 2 posts - I have 13 year olds down to a 3 year old. All of your thoughts are 100% dead on. But how does my 3 and 5 year old make it each time in a bowl or toliet, and my 13 and 9 year olds spray it all over the toliet/wall, or get it all in the bed?! [shrieking this as I was cleaning up all that mess!!!] :)

  23. rachel says:

    ooooh yeah!

    I even see the difference between 8 and 3. Wow.

    I love kids who can swallow pills. It’s amazing.

  24. peepnroosmom says:

    Hey, there IS an upside to having a 12 year old. And they can lay around quietly, usually, on the couch and not have to be read to constantly.
    I hope the littles are feeling better today.

  25. Laura says:

    FUNNY!! I am delurking today - yours is my favorite blog. (No need to try to email me - you have enough to do.) You are funny, humble and real. I am a mama of a 18 month old and another one newly on the way. Thanks for sharing yourself and your family! =)

  26. wendy says:

    When my teenagers are sick, they pretty much lock themselves in their room. The 10 year old is starting to get that way (although he puked all over the bunkbeds and the bathroom floor this weekend.) The 6 year old still wants constant attention. But, thank god none of mine are in diapers!

  27. Maine Mom says:

    You are so right! My oldest is almost 8 and she is A LOT easier to take care of when she’s sick than my youngest two. The day my children learn to puke in the toilet is a very happy day for me!

  28. Inthefastlane says:

    My favorite is the clinging to the pants. Especially in the AM when I am likely to still be wearing my baggy pajama pants. I think I have flashed my neighbors quite few times. Free show!

  29. J. Fergie says:

    i hear ya on #11 and #12!!

  30. liz says:

    So very, very true.

  31. julie says:

    seeeeeeee, their are some good qualities in 12 year olds. Smile!

  32. Maddy says:

    You’re spot on, I love that they like to be in their own space and no longer have to have you at their side to feel their pain with them.

  33. Laura K. says:

    rofl! I think many of us know exactly how you feel right now!

  34. Nicki says:

    You have given me something to look forward to. When my 4 yr old is sick he wants me. Just me. He wants me to hold him until the fever breaks. In cold weather I end up with a tank top on and sweating. the boy can put off some heat!!!

  35. Rae says:

    I loved the last post, especially the image of a toddler demanding his way in house “decorating” but this was completely encouraging. I have three sick young kids and needed a little hope for the future. Thanks. Number 11 is probably top on their to do list, if you don’t include the tugging on pants.

  36. Grace says:

    TWO little ones not feeling well? OY! Hopefully today is better.

  37. Hannah says:

    LOL, I’m in sickdom right now along with all my 3. The sucky-est part (no pun intended) is that my 21 mth old is still breastfeeding and insists on using me as his personal comforter day and night.

  38. Cheryl says:

    so true , so true! It is hard having sick little ones. It is alot easier when they are older thats for sure.

  39. liz says:

    It seems to me that the people I know with a lot of kids (4+) are the ones that love the babies and toddlers. I have 2 kids and barely made it through the toddler stage. Mine are in high school now and I LOVE LOVE LOVE the teenager stage — so much more fun than the toddler stage. The only problem with teenagers is I know they’ll be gone before I know it.

  40. Mocha says:

    I’ll never complain again about having two kids in diapers at the same time. However, it took a long time for me to stop going down that aisle at the store. It was so automatic.

    You know whereof I speak.

  41. creative-type dad says:

    With you on the diapers. Just so wrong…

  42. Gina says:

    I totally have to show this post to my 11-year-old and say, “I told you so!”

    He doesn’t get this age thing.