In which I don’t mention shoes at all
March 12, 2007
Nothing says I am rapidly approaching middle age like back to back to back doctor appointments.
Friday I have my first ever mammogram. I am not certain how they deal with people who are not endowed in the breastular region. I fear I will have to lie prone on the machine and have them squish my body back to front.
Or else they will laugh and tell me that if I had a tumor it would be visible to the naked eye since there is nothing for it to hide behind.
Also, on Friday, I get to have an ultrasound for the thyroid tumor that I have. It was biopsied a few years back and came back benign, so I am not particularly worried about this ultrasound. If it has grown considerably in size then my thyroid will have to be removed. But looking on the bright side I can tell people I got the scar in a knife fight. And then add, “You should see the other person.” Thus furthering the illusion that I am tough and to be feared.
Last week my daughter wanted slip-slops.*
Yesterday she said she needed a bounce-aline.**
Today she informed me that for Halloween she was going to be Legoless in water wings.
“Why? Does he swim?”
“No. He shoots people with his bow and arrows.”
“Then why does he need water wings?”
“That is the NAME OF THE MOVIE. Wah-dah Wings***.”
God, I love this age.
For those uneducated in toddler-ease, *flip-flops, **trampoline, ***Lord of the Rings.
RSS feed for comments on this post.
The URI to TrackBack this entry is: