Wednesday
February 13, 2008
This morning (last night?) it snowed. A very wet snow. But since it was warmish today the snow began melting. Mass flooding all over the place. Not that I really have to worry too much about flooding since I live on top of a mountain, or for those of you who live on or near actual snow capped mountains, a hill. We do have a sump pump in our basement, because like most other people who own old houses the basement is not water tight.
Imagine walking on top of what appears to be a foot of snow. Only it is eight inches of snow floating on top of four inches of water.
Shoveling it all out of the way was hard work. I hate hard work. My 13 yr old and 10 yr old did as much work as I did. Truth be told my 13 year old did most of it. He is much much stronger than I am and could fling the snow around like it was nothing.
Completely unrelated:
***
Miles just picked something up off the kitchen floor and held it up for me to see. It is small and brown.
“Look at this crap!”
“What is it, Miles?”
“I tell you, it is crap.”
“Oh, yuck.” I answer trying not to laugh.
“Yes, it is crap and it smells like crap.”
“What is it?”
“Crap. It is crap.” He answers exasperated with me.
“Is it poop?”
“No, not poop. I said crap.”
“Is it food?”
“No. You don’t EAT crap.” He is annoyed and gesticulates wildly with his hands, clearly thinking how could he possibly have been born with such a stupid mother.
“Of course not.”
“Here smell my hands. Smell the crap.”
“That’s ok. I don’t want to.”
“Yes, you do want to smell crap.”
“Where did the crap come from, do you think?”
“It came from shoes. From crappy shoes.”
I am dying laughing. So he starts yelling for his brothers.
“Guys! Guys! Get your butts over here. Clean up all this crap!”
RSS feed for comments on this post.
The URI to TrackBack this entry is:
http://www.notesfromthetrenches.com/2008/02/13/wednesday-2/trackback/
That’s hysterical. What *was* it actually?
February 13th, 2008 at 8:55 pmChris - I think you could write a book of Miles-isms - -HILARIOUS. I dont think I could’ve kept from bursting out laughing.
Also, the front of your house is gorgeous. I dont think i’ve seen the front before in your other pics.
We had all ice here last night/this am - but if we get snow, can I borrow your 13 year old? I hate cold weather, I hate snow & I hate shoveling!
February 13th, 2008 at 9:01 pmFunniest thing I’ve read all day! Thanks Chris
February 13th, 2008 at 9:01 pmOK, I rarely LOL at anything I read. Even if it is funny, I just smile. I’m a hard nut to crack, I tell ya. But that got a snort and a chuckle out of me. For the rest of the night I’m just going to randomly say, “I tell you, it is crap.”
February 13th, 2008 at 9:05 pmI am in Western Mass right now (heading back south tomorrow) and can TOTALLY relate to that awful mess of which you speak. My pants were soaked from walking across the driveway tonight. And tomorrow, when all the flooding has frozen in the 18˚ temperatures that are forecast for tonight… well then the fun will really begin.
February 13th, 2008 at 9:10 pmI don’t think I would do anything but laugh all day if I lived with you all! Your kids crack me up!
February 13th, 2008 at 9:39 pmI just read this to my thirteen year old daughter. She loves Miles stories. Actually, everyone in our house belongs to the Miles fan club. She said, “That kid should have his own TV show. All Miles, All The Time.” I agree!
February 13th, 2008 at 9:43 pmOh sweet lord. I don’t think I have laughed that hard in a long time. After two kids my bladder control is not that great and you almost made me pee on the couch. “Yes, you do want to smell crap.” BWAHAHAHAHAHA! He is a keeper!
About a year ago, when my daughter was 2 1/2, she walked into a public restroom (a very crowded one, I might add) and announced very loudly, “It smells like shit in here, but I can’t see the shit. Where is the shit? I bet I can find it.”
I can’t take these kids anywhere.
February 13th, 2008 at 9:45 pmWhat a fun age! I love how he demands that others do his work…be it pull his sled or clean up the crap. I want his life.
February 13th, 2008 at 9:50 pmComing out of lurkdom to wonder where the pictures are of THAT exchange?
February 13th, 2008 at 9:50 pmPriceless. I can’t wait until mine starts talking…..
That kid is hilarious! Thanks for posting that, I really needed something funny right now.
February 13th, 2008 at 9:56 pmOMG I am laughing hysterically about the crap. He is a funny kid
February 13th, 2008 at 10:13 pmOh my, The Crap story has me laughing out loud. After reading it twice, I’m still not sure exactly what the crap was, but I’m sure it wasn’t poop. Lord.
February 13th, 2008 at 10:14 pmOk, my husband wanted to know why I was “chortling” over here in the next room. I had to read your story out to him and I couldn’t make it through. . . I am dying laughing. I may have pulled a muscle.
February 13th, 2008 at 10:18 pmHoly crap (as opposed to regular crap)… that’s the most I’ve laughed all day… So, um, was it actually crap from crappy shoes?
February 13th, 2008 at 10:18 pmoh crap! i love miles.
February 13th, 2008 at 10:19 pmOh man, you make me feel like a better parent! This sounds like conversations I’ve had with my almost three year old. Too funny. You can tell he has older brothers. Mine on the other hand…well his dad and I must take all the credit for his potty mouth.
February 13th, 2008 at 10:19 pmIt’s obvious who’s in charge in your house! Did they come clean it up?
February 13th, 2008 at 10:24 pmyou are killing me !!!!
February 13th, 2008 at 10:27 pmI shoveled heavy snow today, so I know exactly what you are talking about there! Miles…you are too funny!
February 13th, 2008 at 10:28 pmLOL My husband said that sounds like something that would be in a Dr Seuss book..
February 13th, 2008 at 10:29 pmOh my gosh. I’m dying laughing too. That is hilarious.
February 13th, 2008 at 10:32 pmOh how I don’t miss the north. Except for you, of course. xoxo, hon.
February 13th, 2008 at 10:35 pmIt’s me again, your lurker.
I’m laughing my head off at Miles’ comment. It’s a darned good thing kids are cute, huh? He is precious.
February 13th, 2008 at 10:39 pmWould you please record and post Miles’ voice saying something like this someday. I’d love to hear it! He’s a very funny three year old!
February 13th, 2008 at 10:41 pmoh my god, you gotta love that Miles - he is hilarious
February 13th, 2008 at 10:52 pmOh golly… or should I say, “Oh, crap?”
February 13th, 2008 at 11:01 pmOne wonders where he gets that from…hmmm?
And nothing worse than shoveling wet, wet snow.
February 13th, 2008 at 11:13 pmGod, I hate when my shoes crap all over the floor. It is just such crap!
February 13th, 2008 at 11:17 pmI’m not going to lie…I laughed and snorted really loud. Crap will be my word of the day tomorrow!
February 14th, 2008 at 12:16 amWhat is it with “crap”? My 3 year old looked down at a messy diaper the other day and said, “Look at all that crap! That’s a lot of crap!” We’ve never used that word in relation to diapers. It was so hard to keep from cracking up. Kudos on your site.
February 14th, 2008 at 12:19 amCrap, that was funny!
February 14th, 2008 at 1:43 amWhat was it?
That’s a Loooooong driveway. I don’t blame you for hating that kind of hard work. Good thing for those 13 year olds paying off.
February 14th, 2008 at 2:32 amFUNNY!!!! He is hilarious.
And as for the snow, ugh, I feel for you.
February 14th, 2008 at 3:18 amChris,
February 14th, 2008 at 6:48 amThanks. I needed that. Still laughing.
OMG that is hysterical!
February 14th, 2008 at 6:49 amGod I miss that age! As for the snow I am still waiting for some down here so bring it on.
When Bryant was 2, I was living in Italy and I had a few bad habits, one of which was saying the Gosh dammit (different word for gosh) and I finally stopped saying that when B would walk around the house purposly drop things, and say GD.. and pick it up LOLOL. It was even funnier cuz he would take things out of his little purse he had!
February 14th, 2008 at 8:29 amOh my gawd!!!! Still laughing here… I LOVE him!!!! Too freakin cute!!
February 14th, 2008 at 8:39 amOh Crap, I think I just laughed to hard!
Too Funny! I love the picture, I don’t think I have ever seen the outside of your house, it’s gorgeous! Don’t float away in all that flooding, we have more snow on the way- Ugh.
Happy Valentine’s Day!
February 14th, 2008 at 9:26 amoh, that made me laugh. outloud even.
February 14th, 2008 at 9:39 amWith a driveway that long you really need a snow blower! I swear I like winter more now that I don’t have to break my back shoveling. It takes me about 10 min to get all of the snow off my driveway and walkways and I’m done where before if it snowed I would have to shovel for hours in the mornings!
Chris says: We do have a huge snowblower. BUT you can not use a snowblower on a foot of slush.
February 14th, 2008 at 10:30 amHahaha! There’s lots of “crap” in my house too, only sometimes it’s really CRAP! EWWWW! My two year old has taken to “investigating” the contents of his diaper, and producing a handful of …well, you know.
February 14th, 2008 at 11:28 amAnyhow, my three year old often shows the same exasperation at being born into a family of such bumbling idiots;-) Too cute!
“Crap” that was cute.
February 14th, 2008 at 12:00 pmAny snow we get around here is always slushy. My kids don’t know what REAL snow is like. Any way you cut it, it is a mess!
Dang, you have a long, long, long driveway.
Chris says: That is only half of it. It is a horseshoe shape.
February 14th, 2008 at 12:18 pmH-I-L-A-R-I-O-U-S!!! This is why I come to read your blog everyday. I am always hoping for a Miles story or is it the photo blog of your daughter’s shoe collection - no it’s Miles!
February 14th, 2008 at 12:22 pmMiles is so going to be a comedian when he grows up. I’ll vote for him on Last Comic Standing session 23.
February 14th, 2008 at 12:29 pmThat is hilarious! Out of the mouth of babes!
February 14th, 2008 at 1:43 pmOh Crap! That kid is too funny.
The shoveling - - just another reason I don’t want to move north.
February 14th, 2008 at 2:11 pmThat was hilarious! Miles cracks me up. Thats the hardest I have laughed all day. He is such a smart little three year old.
February 14th, 2008 at 2:38 pmI just laughed out loud at that one. It’s so hard to keep a straight face when your kids repeat something they shouldn’t that you’ve obviously said at one point or another…my 3 1/2 year old has been known to spout out “Dammit” when frustrated.
February 14th, 2008 at 2:48 pmI love hearing about and seeing your snow, since I live in Mississippi.
February 14th, 2008 at 2:54 pmI haven’t commented here in forever, but I am laughing so hard right now I just couldn’t help myself. I can hardly wait until my 2 1/2 year old makes it to 3. Priceless!!!
February 14th, 2008 at 5:37 pmWhy is Miles so freaking hilarious? I am still laughing about “It’s not Jesus, it’s me, your favorite Miles.”
February 14th, 2008 at 7:39 pmI don’t no anything about snow and water under snow, but that conversation was priceless.
February 14th, 2008 at 8:15 pmCan I just say I love Miles?? Cause the boy makes me smile so often!
I’d love to see him and my 3 yr. old granddaughter Kylie together. She’s the one who let everyone at hubby’s Xmas party know that Santa scared the frickin’ crap out of her
February 15th, 2008 at 12:40 amI just about choked to death reading that. It’s really hard to laugh hysterically while trying not to wake up kids.
February 15th, 2008 at 2:09 amthat’s very verbose.
i just had this crap conversation with my 6 y o. but it was regarding eating candy for breakfast and my short-tempered answer…..i am such a good mom!
Chris says: Yes, Miles will NOT stop talking. Ever. I think we had the same conversation here this morning too.
February 15th, 2008 at 1:07 pm[...] picture that I have of me in the coat is an unfortunate visual of me looking rather squaty and just crappy. I can’t go around posting pictures of myself like that or you might think that I am [...]
February 16th, 2008 at 1:34 amThe dialog with Miles was the first blog post I’ve ever read (in 7+ years of blog reading!) that made me cry with laughter. Thanks for posting it.
February 16th, 2008 at 1:35 am