Notes from the Straightjacket
June 3, 2008
This is what I have begun resorting to, copying instant messages in lieu of a real post, with proper punctuation, and a coherent narrative.
Me: My son’s last baseball game was soooo pathetic
Me: and I am equally pathetic for CARING
Her: yeah how do you NOT though?
Me: but my god he went from being the lead batter to batting eighth
Me: and next week I can bet he will be behind the kid with the lisp, who ducks and jumps out of the box with every pitch
Her: that’s funny
Me: and sadly true. I want to rip the bat out of his hand and beat him over the head with it.
Me: I also want to beat his coach with it, too. It is a toss up these days.
Me: Who knew little league could inspire such a violent streak in me.
Me: Then to make it even worse
Me: [Son] was in the outfield eating sunflower seeds
Me: and got his hand stuck in his pocket
Her: okay how exactly does that happen?
Me: and missed the one and only ball that came to him
Her: *snort*
Me: yeah he brings blonde to a whole new level
Want to read more about what will drive me to a straight jacket?
Today over at Work It, Mom! I did a new twist on the recipes. Linking to people who have posted summer friendly recipes I think sound delicious and are easy enough to be made from the confines of my straight jacket. All of these have made it to my short list. You know, once I stop feeding my children from the snack bar.
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Better he had his hand stuck in his back pocket than the front though, right?
FYI…We have a 39-year-old friend who, to this day, has a nickname of “Snickers.” Why? Because 32 years ago when we were in Little League, he slid into home plate and a Snicker’s bar fell out of his sock. From that perspective, maybe sunflower seeds aren’t so bad!
June 3rd, 2008 at 3:11 pmi worked for the local parks and rec as a scorekeeper. I’ve seen pretty much everything. If you think your bad now, wait until it’s your grandchild. Those Grandparents where hell on the umps!! By the way, the reason my 5 year old son isn’t in baseball…yet. Although, I know it’s coming.
June 3rd, 2008 at 3:15 pmahhhh. Ball is finally over for us.
June 3rd, 2008 at 3:19 pmWhen I was in Little League I used to pee in my cup…at least your son’s not doing that
Adam
http://adam-finch.eachday.com
June 3rd, 2008 at 3:27 pmAhhh- the blonde kids! What would we ever do with out them? And what on earth would we talk about!
Oh- and sometimes IM’s are the only communication available
June 3rd, 2008 at 3:45 pmMy daughter was asked not to join soccer in first grade because she was so concerned with her socks being at the same level that she would stop in the middle of a play to adjust her socks.
Turns out, I’m more of a dance mom anyway.
June 3rd, 2008 at 4:14 pmThere’s a solution to your angst - stop watching the game. Bring some knitting or a book or something…ignorance is bliss…
June 3rd, 2008 at 4:16 pmAh, a meal. We haven’t had a real one since baseball started. I don’t think I have been to the grocery for a full round in a few weeks! Tonight is the last night for baseball and a grilled hot dog for a while! Last night they didn’t have anyone to man the grill! It was quite the huge dissapointment for my 3 year old…the hot dog expert!
June 3rd, 2008 at 5:17 pmThe coach yelled at my son last night to get out of the mud puddle and watch for the ball! He at least turned around and grinned at me after he did it! Too funny!
I love this kid because I too, have managed to get my hand stuck in my pocket. It’s a non-logical thing. You have something in your hand, making it to big to leave pocket, therefore PANIC, PANIC! Awesomeness.
June 3rd, 2008 at 8:35 pmI’ve loved being able to watch my two grandsons playing this spring. But, now that I think about it, there are a couple of grandparents in the stands that seem to mirror Nikki’s opinion of grandparents attitude toward umps.
June 3rd, 2008 at 9:28 pmSunflower seeds are better than picking his nose.
June 4th, 2008 at 8:24 amSee, this is why I won’t even go to my 6 year old son’s soccer games, that’s daddy’s job. I just know if I go I won’t be able to cultivate the proper level of detachment. Plus there’s the whole getting out of bed early on a Saturday morning thing too.
June 5th, 2008 at 4:19 am