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Scenes from Thanksgiving

Scenes from Thanksgiving

November 27, 2008

Yesterday afternooon I flew into Chicago. Again. I feel like I should be on a first name basis with the flight crew now.

I woke up this morning at 4am. Half because I was worried that I would over sleep and miss my 6am pick-up. The other half because my cell phone alarm is set to go off at 5am, which is 4am central time.


Media truck in the parking lot at o’ dark o’clock. Either that or it is a snow cone truck.


Carol giving a radio interview. I really want to steal that sign and bring it home. It would be a sign for the kids to leave me alone. I may punch a hole in the top of it and then on bad days just wear it around my neck.


Not a Butterball. But so creative. Roxanna said that she could make one of these. She looked at me like it was something we could all do easily. Uh, yeah, I could buy one of these!


Mary giving an interview. She has forgotten more about turkey than you will ever know. I kid. I don’t think she has forgotten anything.


Clare hard at work. I love her.


My boots. I love these boots. Probably more than I love Clare, but shhh, don’t tell her.

Apparently the most popular question that people call the Talk-Line asking on Thanksgiving Day is what to do with their turkey that is still frozen. I learned that the correct answer is not, “Wow you are shit out of luck. Go find some Chinese take-out.” In fact, you can cook a turkey from frozen.


Food stylist making sure the turkey shows its good side.

It is now 8:15 CST. I have a radio interview coming up soon. I am all prepared to answer the question of what to do if your turkey is frozen and you want to eat it today. Which means that I won’t be asked this question.

Posted by Chris @ 10:30 am  

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  1. Kerry says:

    My turkey defrosted (HA!) in the fridge for a WEEK and it was STILL frozen this morning. And leaking. How can it be still frozen and leaking at the same time?!?!

    That media truck is a bit scary.

    Happy Thanksgiving. Have a wonderful day, and please post pictures of the feast your husband has waiting for you upon your return.

  2. Annika says:

    I don’t anticipate having any turkey-related questions, but if you like I can call and ask for you and ask you what to do with my frozen turkey. I’d hate for your knowledge to go to waste.

  3. Heather says:

    Okay, THAT turkey cake looks a lot better than the freaky one I saw at the store last night. Still, I was tempted to buy it and put it on the table as though it were the real turkey to see what my family would do. Because no one is going to tell the hostess that her turkey looks weird.

  4. Deputy's Wife says:

    Chris I hate to tell you this, but we are having ham.

    It’s still Thanksgiving when ham is served. Isn’t it?

  5. Stacey says:

    HA! Our turkey says “DO NOT THAW” all over it. We were a bit last minute in deciding to do one (no family around, etc. etc…) and all the grocery store had was a Butterball Stuffed Turkey. The stuffing is all inside it ready to go already. Apparently that’s why you can’t defrost it? Or at least that’s what I got from the online FAQs. It’s been in the oven since about 9 this morning, hopefully it’s done at some point today.

  6. Amanda says:

    I bought an utterballbay turkey and it’s still slightly frozen. I read the directions inside where it says what to do if that happens. It just takes a little longer.

    What about when someone calls in asking you what to do when their in laws and 7yo have not SHUT UP since upon waking around 7am? I don’t do mornings, let alone talk to people. My solution has been to steal some of DH’s CPT Morgan and put it in my glass of coke. It was either that or slit my wrists with my chef’s knife while I was dicing onions and celery for the stuffing.

  7. Leeann says:

    I have honestly decided that this whole defrosting-in-the-refrigerator thing is a total sham. I mean, does it ever really WORK? lol I buy oven-roaster chickens when they are on sale and freeze them. After three days of trying to thaw them in the fridge, I give up and put it on the counter. It is insane!

    I can see planning ahead enough for a turkey, although my guess is that it would take at least a full week to thaw in the refrigerator and even then, I bet the bag of stuff inside is still frozen in the bird!

    Chris, enlighten us!

    Leeann—> who bought a FRESH Butterball so I wouldn’t have to deal with all the thawing crap.

  8. Jeannette says:

    Those are beautiful boots!
    Happy Thanksgiving! Thanks for writing about your life. You make me feel more capable of doing this raising children thing!

  9. Jo Anne says:

    To heck will all the turkey stuff–I L-O-V-E the boots–you should wear them everywhere, even around the house with your favorite sweats. Have a safe flight home and enjoy your family Thanksgiving. And, I agree, you need to post photos of the family feast.

  10. Andrea says:

    I went to browse the Butterball site today, and I thought of you! The Canadian Thanksgiving is long done but Christmas is sneaking up on us fast, and this will be my first year making Christmas dinner, so I figured I had better start studying now since I want to work very hard not to poison everybody on the first try. I will save that for next year, when they have been lulled into a false sense of security.

    The pre-stuffed, cook-from-frozen option looks particularly appealing, but I still can’t figure out if Butterball is sold in Canada or not. I will probably have to actually call the shops and speak to a live human to find that out . . . in any event, looking sharp! Love those boots.

    (not a Butterball either, but isn’t he cute?! And he looks quite tasty, too)

  11. jodi says:

    I’ve only had a radio interview once and would have loved the sign. Then I wouldn’t have had to use all of the facial movements and hand gestures to people around me. Come to think of it I would have liked to have looked/felt that calm!!

    Liked the boots! Happy Thanksgiving.

  12. peepnroosmom says:

    The Turkey Talk looks like alot of fun! Love your shoes!

  13. Daisy says:

    Love the boots! The whole thing looks like fun. We’ve thawed turkey in desperation in cold water in the sink. Only once; we’ve been better at thawing them in advance since then!

  14. Christy says:

    Happy Thanksgiving Chris. Is it wrong that I thought about you just as I was “taking my turkey’s temperature?”

    Hope you had a wonderful time in Chicago!

  15. Keyona says:

    Of course they never would ask a question you are actually ready for….Happy Thanksgiving to you and your family.

  16. Fear and Parenting in Las Vegas says:

    I want that sign too! Forget the string. I’m thinking sandwich board and mass production! We can have thousands ready by Mother’s day. It’s the ultimate gift! If you order now, you can get you’re own Mommy Magic Eight ball - just shake it until you get the answer you want! Don’t want to eat your peas? Shake-shake. “They’re good for you.” If that’s not acceptable, shake again! “Then there’s nothing else till breakfast.” Of course, you risk the final words: “Because I said so!”

  17. CaliforniaGrammy says:

    So I was sure you’d tell us about cooking a frozen turkey! What temperature, and for how long? Methinks I’d have to setting my alarm clock for o’dark o’clock for sure to be cooking a frozen bird! Chris, do tell!

  18. Barb says:

    I actually called the hotline with this question once. I think they told me to put it in the sink and change the water every 15 minutes or something. Does that sound right?

    I hate being responsible for making the turkey. I’m always worried I’m going to poison everyone. :-\

  19. taffi says:

    So what DO you do if your turkey is still frozen?

    Love your boots, by the way.

  20. Karla says:

    I want one of those signs too. I might have to hang it outside the bathroom door.

  21. Corey says:

    I hope you had a lovely Thanksgiving, and those are some kick-ass boots. Love them!

  22. Brigitte says:

    Mine was like Kerry’s (frozen in the middle but leaking after defrosting a week in the fridge). I cooked it to HIGHER than the recommended temp and the meat was all pulled back on the bones until I thought it would be jerky. Turned out it was fine, except for excessive pinkness in the thighs - got liability waivers for guests to sign in case we give them salmonella? ;-)

  23. falwyn says:

    So how DO you cook a frozen turkey?? I’m really dying to know. Sure I could google it, but as a rule, the google answer tends to be dry and boring, where yours will be sarcastic and witty and awesome. So I must beg you to tell us!

  24. Lucy says:

    I know I must be dense but what are all these trips to Chicago about? And the turkeys? And the interviews? I read your blog regularly so I feel I must have missed something.

    PS. I love your boots too!

  25. G.R.G. says:

    Wow! So I wasn’t alone with my big ass bird which refused to thaw in the time the chart dictated? I feel better now. I agree — the truck is scary!

  26. Johna says:

    That is one great cake decorating job!

  27. Maggie says:

    I love your boots! They are fabulous. I agree with Kerry, that truck was scary. Especially at dark o’clock.

  28. Anna says:

    Hey! I just saw your profile pic over on facebook (through Kristen’s/Better Now friend list…) and it is a lovely picture.

    And those are some super sassy boots! :)

  29. jen@Balancing Beauty and Bedlam says:

    WE Love the BOOTS, and we wont’ tell Clare.

    How did your son do during Thanksgiving. We will be in FL as well for the National Championship. They won their regional game Saturday. We are in the Midget division…now I’ll have to go browse your archives to see what you look like, so I can be on the look out. :)
    I don’t know about you, but since we just found out we’re going, planning “disney” in a week and clearing the calendar is going to be a challenge.

  30. Rebecca says:

    Love the boots too!!!!

  31. abrandname says:

    I swear to the sweet lord above that I am crying right now. …I found you because of Mir…..I started reading her and found you…..I started reading you a couple of months ago and have read your archives up till today….I feel like I know you and that we are best friends….I know that sounds creepy, it’s actually a compliment….you are a fantastic writer…..and you say the things I want to….I seriously don’t know how you have the energy to open your eyes let alone blog about your life….I will not be one of those idiots that says something about you having 7 children…..to me that means that there are 7 children who are growing up with a loving mother and will someday inherit a great legacy and timeline of their childhoods….that is something special….

    I hope your holiday was great and I hope that your kids a feeling better…..

    I will never lurk again….Promise

  32. kimberly/tippytoes says:

    I’d love an ON THE AIR necklace too! I’ll buy the headpiece to go with it, anything to make my kids leave me alone for a minute!

  33. rose says:

    I’ve never commented before, but I HAVE to ask…

    WHERE did you get those boots?!?