The Birthday Partying Continues

March 30, 2009

My step father’s family is Italian. He was the first generation to be born here in the United States. So even though I do not have a drop of anything non-WASPY in me, I have always felt like I was Italian by association.

Every single one of my birthdays I had an Italian rum cake. I loved this cake. And I also loved that hardly any of my friends liked it because there would always be tons of cake leftover after my parties that I could eat myself. (And I wonder where my children get their selfish attitudes from)

I was telling my kids about the beloved rum cake when Rob said that he always had to have a rum cake for his birthday also. Except he hated it.

My son decided there and then that he had to have an Italian rum cake for his next birthday.

We found an Italian bakery in Austin and ordered him one. This is a cake they told us would feed 10 people. I guess everything really IS bigger in TX because this cake would easily feed 30 people. I had to clear an entire shelf off in the refrigerator for it.

All of the kids loved the rum cake. Except… this was not at all like the Italian rum cakes Rob and I had for our birthdays as children. Not that I could eat it anyway, since it is made with gluteny goodness that I can’t eat.

We only ate 1/4 of the cake last night. At this rate we can save it and reuse it for the next few birthdays that are coming up.

And just so I don’t forget.

Yesterday he pitched his very first baseball game. Two innings. Six kids up at bat. Six kids struck out. He was very excited. He had a really bad season last year, in part because he had an awful coach. (Hahahaha I just found this post I write last year about him playing baseball. It still makes me laugh.)

Unfortunately I didn’t get to see it. Though to be honest whenever my kids pitch I feel like I age ten years during the game. I am really 5039 right now. We had three games happening at the same time and I was watching Miles’ game. Though I use the term “game” loosely.

My oldest son is pitching his game tonight. I will be there growing older. I might bring my flask.

Ten Years

March 29, 2009

One day you are watching your chubby faced baby

then before you know it, this has happened,

ten years have flown by

and that chubby faced baby is approaching 6ft tall

a lot changes in ten years

the signs are already there.

Personal Conversation with Myself

March 28, 2009

Crazy people, it would seem, live everywhere.

Today at my 8 yr old son’s baseball scrimmage I was yelled at by a mother of one of my son’s team mates. The woman is clearly bat shit crazy. I had been warned to stay away from this woman, that she was crazy. But you know, I sort of take crazy to be a term of endearment. Another word for kooky, eccentric, odd. Now I know. Sometimes crazy means actually CRAZY, in all caps. And that kind of crazy, you should stay the hell away from.

To back up the story a bit, this mother is one of those mothers who thinks that the sun rises and sets on her child. He has a halo of pure spun gold and unicorns bow down before him. Like the Baby jesus, only better.

Anyway, the mother always has a problem about where her son is playing. Clearly the coaches do not yet realize he is Jesus, the Baseball Superstar. She is very vocal about her displeasure with her son playing any other position but first base.

So today when he was rotated into the outfield, like EVERY SINGLE OTHER child on the team, she had a problem with it. What with the rest of our kids not being Jesus incarnate it is okay for them to have a turn in the outfield. And when she LOUDLY complained that she wants her son to play where the action is and not in left field (incidentally the position from which my son had just rotated out ), well I got annoyed and was forced to call her out on it.

So I turned to her and said, “All of our kids are rotating into the outfield. Every single one of them. I think you need to stop complaining.”

She completely lost her ever lovin’ mind. She stood up and began screaming at me. Got IN MY FACE and yelled at me. It was surreal. She said I was “disrespecting” her and should mind my own business, because she was, and this is an exact quote, “Having a personal conversation with myself.”

I countered with, “But you were looking right at me when you said it TWICE. Not to mention you yell out to the field every single day where you think the coaches should put your kid.”

She got up and dragged her chair away, yelling and saying she wasn’t putting up with this and would pull her son off of the team, making a huge scene. She went and sat in her car. Then came back a few minutes later and yelled at me some more. She called me a bitch at one point. I really said nothing else except to clarify exactly what I had said, which is all the kids are playing in the outfield.

She went back and forth to her car a few times. Everyone else sitting around agreed that her reaction was completely and totally over the top. The last time she came over and stood in front of me I told her that I was done with the conversation. I was not talking about it anymore. She continued talking, while I continued to ignore her, which enraged her even more. Because HOW DARE I IGNORE SOMEONE WHO WANTS TO TELL ME OFF.

Rob told me afterward he was watching her hands because he thought for sure she was going to hit me. I have never hit anyone in my entire life, but I honestly wanted to punch this woman. And for the briefest of moments I thought to myself, I bet I could take her. But then just as quickly I realized I would have to get up from my chair to punch her and it would probably hurt my hand. I came to the conclusion that I am not so much a pacifist as I am lazy. With a strong distaste for hurting myself.

I talked to Heather on the phone later on in the day and she said I should have told her the next time she is having a “personal conversation with herself” that she should do it more quietly. Or perhaps inside her head like the rest of us. And I had one of those moments where I thought damn, I wish I had said that.

Answering the Age Old Question

What should I make for dinner?

Enchilada Casserole over at Work It, Mom! Delicious, easy, and fourteen enthusiastic thumbs up. What else could you ask for?

I can’t promise you it will be as exciting a fast spiral slide and sunny weather warm enough to wear a sleeveless sundress, but I can only give you so much.

Don’t Try This At Home

March 26, 2009

This is what happens when your 8yr old son decides to throw a golf ball at the front door. But why? WHY? You might be asking yourself.

Don’t even bother to ask why. There is no answer.

Then we all stood there and watched while the tempered glass slowly cracked and shattered. Well, not all of us. A certain 8yr old was banished to his bedroom. Partly as punishment. Partly for his own safety.

I’d really like a dull moment or two around here.

Reason # 568

March 25, 2009

Why I love Susan.

I texted her to tell her that we were having a tornado warning. And HAIL!

And she texted back. TIP: Take the vodka into the shelter with you.

Sadly I had to text her back and tell her that I was trapped in traffic on the highway. But as soon as I got home I would take her advice.

Then I called her so she could hear the hail while I was driving. I like to be as distracted as possible while operating a vehicle apparently.

Now You Are Ten

How exactly this has happened, I don’t know. It seems like just last week you were a fat, bald baby who did nothing but smile. The time from then to now is mostly a blur. The days that seemed so terminally long when I was living them, living with four children aged four and under, have melded into years that have passed too quickly.

You and your younger brother have always been best friends.

Your personalities could not be more different. You are easy going and happy. Your brother is intense and brooding.

You alternate between being the best of friends and the worst of enemies. The good thing is that both of you are able to laugh at yourselves. Also, that you are infinitely forgiving. It takes a lot to get you angry. Your brother will get angry with you and chase you around the house intent on killing you, meanwhile you will be running around, two steps ahead of him, laughing. Eventually your contagious laughter catches up with him. And he laughs too, in spite of himself.

Of all my children, you are the two I imagine still being best friends when you are adults.

Welcome to double digits.

Tree Climbers

March 24, 2009

The Economy

March 20, 2009

Our latest Backtalk show went live yesterday in which we discuss the economy.

I am being taken to task by a couple of comments at BlogHer (and via private EMAIL!) for making fun of and/or questioning the integrity of the website $5 dinners.

What I actually said was that the contributors to the site obviously do not have teenage boys. I referenced a recipe that was up at the time we filmed for hamburgers and sweet potato fries.

Four hamburgers do not feed any four people in my house. Every one eats more than one burger, except maybe my 4 and 5 yr olds, though on any given day they might eat a second one or none at all. It is a crap shoot!

I was sort of joking about this, because obviously every family is different. I just didn’t want people to go over there and start sending me emails that the meals really are not five dollar meals. Prices of food vary by region and I suppose I have always lived in the land of expensive food, both CT and TX, because my food bill has not decreased.

Hell, my oldest son ate 4 hamburgers with buns for dinner all by himself last night. And two sausages in buns.

None of us questioned the integrity of the blogger.

I still maintain that for me the greater purpose of the site was to help you cook more economically and give you ideas for recipes to make your family. EVEN IF IT WILL COST YOU MORE THAN $5.

Oddly no one has yet defended the idea of making your own maxipads. And letting them soak in a bucket in your bathroom. And then using the bloody water to water your garden. Excuse me, I just threw up a little. Also if you do that I am never coming over to your house and eating vegetables. There are just some things I am not willing to do, even if it will save me $30 a year.

Randomness

March 19, 2009

1) I have a bad sunburn on my formerly pasty white arms. I have not had a sunburn in years, probably since I stopped slathering myself in oil and laying out on my tinfoil blanket. Sunburns hurt. I forgot that. I am enjoying the fabulous weather before June comes and merely walking out the front door causes me to instantly dissolve into a pile of embers. At least that is what everyone around here keeps telling me.

2) My daughter made a friend in our neighborhood. She is thrilled because up until now we have only met boys. We were outside in the driveway when my daughter spied some girls down the street. She sent her 8 yr old brother to ask their father if she could play with them. What he actually said was, “My sister is looking for some girls. Can she play with yours?” I think he needs to work on his technique if he ever hopes to be allowed to date.

3) On the same note, I am so damn thankful I have one girl and six boys, not the other way around. My boys have all made friends in the neighborhood, many friends. Not one of those boys ever wanted to come into the house and “see what it looked like” or asked for snacks, or generally just wanted to chat and narrate every last thing until my ears fell off. The new friend is a very sweet girl, but it is like having two of my daughter, which is frankly one too many. Give me boys, outside in the yard, chasing each other with sticks ANYDAY.

4) Another day, another doctor co-pay. My 14 yr old son hurt his back playing baseball. It has been about two weeks and has not improved. In fact, it has gotten worse. That could be because he REFUSED TO STOP PLAYING EVEN THOUGH IT HURT. But what do I know. So we went to a sports medicine doctor today. Diagnosis: pulled muscle. He will have some physical therapy, mostly to show him how to properly stretch and what sort of core strengthening exercises he should do. Which was pretty much what I had been telling him to do, but then again WHAT DO I KNOW?! I really should have gone to medical school just so I could have some authority around here. At least this visit was only the regular dr co-pay.

5) Is it wrong to use google maps to see which people in my neighborhood have built-in pools? So I can befriend them?