The PGA Tour Was Getting a Little Boring
May 8, 2009
Tiger Woods decided to try his hand at being an umpire for youth baseball.*
By pure luck and happenstance, my 10 year old son landed on this team. It has been a fabulous experience for him. Good sportsmanship, fun, and learning skills are emphasized more than winning. And guess what? They are undefeated.
Last night my son was pitching. The top of the fourth inning found us leading 15 - 1. The game was over since there was no way for the other team to make a come back (time restrictions on how long games can be played as well as a 5 run maximum per inning). Other coaches would have put my son back in to quickly end the game and keep our huge lead.
This coach, however, put in a kid who has wanted to learn to pitch, but is one of the younger and smaller ones on the team. “We’re going to have fun!” he told the team. The boys all shouted encouragement to the new pitcher as he threw balls that hit the dirt or went 3 feet over the batter’s head.
“This is called a learning experience!” the coach shouted out to him when he was beginning to grow frustrated, “This is how you get better!”
Parents on both sides cheered for all the kids.
The final score was 15-6. Our team still won, so the boys were all happy. The other team got to have fun the last inning, so they were happy.
I could contrast all of this with my 8 yr old son’s team where competition and winning are valued over everything else. And where the coaching mainly takes the form of screaming at the kids and making them run laps as punishment for dropping balls or missing catches. And I am not even going to get into the record keeping and stats that are kept on the kids that are wrong. Some might even call them LIES. (Do I need to point out again that they are 7 and 8 years old?)
That sort of coaching inevitably fails, much the same way being punitive does in parenting. The season is almost over and luckily for us, my 8 yr old loves this competitive environment. He takes himself very seriously, though I know that the yelling bothers him. Though even he is growing weary of the marathon practices.
*Okay, not really. But doesn’t it look like him?
RSS feed for comments on this post.
My 11 year old has played baseball for years, and it took us years to find a coach that wasn’t a vein popping screamer. My son doesn’t respond to that, he just shuts down and ended up hating those seasons. He even wanted to quit his beloved sport at one time just because of the coaching. Finally we’re on a team that values fun and learning, too, with a coach that teaches and doesn’t demean. It makes all the difference.
May 9th, 2009 at 9:26 amOMW! I have been coaching kids for a long time. From ages u6 to u17. It is an awesome situation to be able to look at each child and thank them for giving them everything they have. I am a yeller though! I yell the entire time..My husband hates it. but it is never a bad yell. When I stop yelling, that is when my children have to be worried!
May 9th, 2009 at 10:09 amxoxo
ronee
A real valuable parenting lesson in here for me.
May 9th, 2009 at 10:36 amI would be tempted to yell at your 8 yr old’s coach if he treated my kids like that. Have any of the parents done that? If so, what happened?
May 9th, 2009 at 11:08 amOK I laughed out loud once I got the joke! Seems like your older son really lucked out getting onto such a supporting team / league. If only all youth sports were like that. I am still trying to teach my almost 7 year old to be a graceful winner / loser. We (my family) have much to learn.
Have a great MOTHER’S DAY!
May 9th, 2009 at 11:09 amWOW. It really does look like him. VERY CUTE!
I’m embarrassed to admit I spent way too much time squinting at the screen trying to see if he was wearing a wedding ring. LOL Such is the life of a single girl.
May 9th, 2009 at 11:19 amLove your 10 yr old’s coach! Around here the coach is usually a dad who ages up with his kid, so your 10 yr old might have this great coach for years!
May 9th, 2009 at 11:22 amGood that your intense kid got the intense coach this year. Hope that one is replaced next year.
It sounds like you are on some really great teams. Coaches can either make or break a team and you have a few good ones.
Yes, he looks like Tiger. I was actually thinking how could that not make the news till I saw your little note. LOL
May 9th, 2009 at 11:33 amMy oldest son, a fabulously talented athlete, played until he reached the mid highschool level. He had then had enough of the pressure of winning, the behind the scenes parents who were doing anything in their power to discredit one player in favor of their own child, and the politics of money in our area. He decided to quit while he still loved sports.
Few of these kids will go on to be professionals. But they can love the game for the rest of their lives, as long as the adults in their lives don’t ruin it for them.
One of my neighbors is a former pro football player. His son is not as talented. This man was caught lying about his son’s stats in order to make him look better to the college scouts.
What does that say to a kid?
Another neighbor worked until he got the high school coach fired, in hopes of getting another coach hired. A coach whose game strategies would support his son’s talents.
This same son stood up in church one day and made the comment that most dads wanted to see their kid successful and happy. Except his dad. His dad just wanted to see his kids playing college ball. Or else.
This is also the Dad that after his son was too timid on a football play, went out on the field, picked his son up, and THREW him down. You know. To teach him how to take a hit.
Oh. The stories I could tell.
May 9th, 2009 at 12:20 pmCongrats to the 10-yr-old for the nice game. And congrats to his coach for having a wonderful attitude towards the sport and the kids.
As for the other coach….a season-end gift of Prozac seems in order. Sheesh.
You, on the other hand, deserve much alcohol. cheers!
May 9th, 2009 at 4:31 pmI just came from my son’s (5 y.o.) baseball game where the other team couldn’t count the number of runs or outs properly (always in their team’s favor). *sigh*
Then, I saw the next team warming up and a kid got slapped on the hand and yelled at for throwing the ball past the coach.
There is also when a coach puts his kid in the draft at the beginning of the season, and another team will pick up the kid of that coach and then say, “I’ll trade you your kid for your best player.” sick sick sick.
Unfortunately, this kind of crap is happening more than what happens on your 10 year olds team. (Kudos to that coach!)
May 9th, 2009 at 5:22 pmIT DOES.
HAPPY MOTHERS DAY
May 9th, 2009 at 5:26 pmit really does look like him,
May 9th, 2009 at 7:02 pmi think you’ve become one of those parents;
hee hee
YAY for the older boy’s coach.
My oldest quit hockey last year because of a bad coach. He just got tired of the yelling. Thus year we would have been a traveling team and my son refused to play for a man that would spend the entire trip eing yelled out.
I’ll miss hockey in August when it’s 115 outside and 33 rink side.
May 9th, 2009 at 11:19 pmSoftball can be preceived at being the same thing- until we really take a step back and aknowledge the fact that these coaches are volunteers! They give up valuable family time to take charge of these teams- sending countless e-mails and spend endless time on the field teaching and coaching and preparing the roster for the next game. They are the ones eating out of crock-pots all over our Nation! Most rush from work to get to the field in time for practice- I say: “Thanks for being so dedicated to a sport that teaching my daughter to better her skills actually means something to you. I applaude your efforts and support and encourage your commiment to OUR team! And thanks for your influence on my kid.” This is a universal sentiment-ball, lax field hockey for us. Give the coaches a break- or coach a team yourself!
May 9th, 2009 at 11:58 pmWe have had wonderful coaches/parents/kids over the years with very few exceptions. I admire your kid for still loving the game even though his coach sounds like a jerk to say it mildly. Still there are difficult people in the world, and it is an important lesson to learn how to deal with them even when you are only 8 years old. I hope it is a lesson that will stay with him. Great news about your 10 year old’s team. How fun!
May 10th, 2009 at 12:51 amI really did think it looked like him. . . What do I know? He could go into baseball. . .
May 11th, 2009 at 4:07 pmI love that coach…and the parents who cheered for both sides. *sniff, sniff*
May 12th, 2009 at 5:23 pm